🌱 Sweatshop-free, vegan-friendly & Earth-friendly.
💥 PROMOTION: Free webcam protector sticker sheets with every order!
Our products are gender-neutral (aka unisex). Except for womens tees, obviously. Size Chart
Regular contemporary fit. Fits true to size. The t-shirts are slightly form-fitting, but not fitted enough to make a difference if you fit comfortably into your normal size. Women might want to order a size down.
Fits true to size. Slightly tailored at the waist, armhole and sleeve for a more flattering silhouette.
UNISEX TANK TOP
Fits true to size. Women might want to order a size down.
Fits true to size (slightly oversized). Classic boxy fit. Women might want to order a size down.
PREMIUM QUALITY COTTON
We use semi-combed ringspun cotton. Just one touch lets you know this isn’t some run of the mill shapeless tee. Learn more
ETHICS & SUSTAINABILITY
ALLRIOT products are sweatshop-free and earth-friendly. Learn more
LAUNDRY & CARE
Wash at 30ºC/90ºF, inside out. For best results iron on reverse. Do not tumble dry.
We’re so sure that you’re going to love your purchase that we’re offering 365-day returns on everything in store. Simply return your unworn merchandise within 365 days for a full refund.
Returns are free for UK & US customers. Exchanges are free for everyone.
To learn more or to make a return, please visit our Returns page.
— BARCODE T-SHIRT – MARCH OF PROGRESS —
In the wrong hands, technological progress can become sociological regression. The dawn of your transhumanist dystopia is here. The 2045 project is almost complete and you are the oil of our great malevolent machine. Eat. Sleep. Work. Worship. Obey. Brainwash. Rinse. Repeat. What a pity…
Crafted in premium quality ringspun cotton, the otherwise stripped-back black and white t-shirt is accented with a simple monochromatic stencil-like print of the March of Progress parody. Never forget, for the penalty is steep: The elite will become mechanical gods. The rest will become automated numbers.
MORE FUNNY POLITICAL T-SHIRTS
The next stage in human development won’t actually be a stage, but a gallows.