ALIEN JESUS T-SHIRT
Rumor has it that aliens have been watching us from afar and began to loathe our self-destructive ways. To help humanity catch up with the rest of the interstellar community, a young farm maiden named Mary was kidnapped, given a good space rooting, and returned her back to farmstead in Bethlehem without raising an eyebrow from Joseph.
Nine months later, Alien Jesus was born from a VIRGIN birth (short for Vaginally Inserted Rapid-Gestation INtercourse). Ingrained with the ancient truths of 5th dimensional beings, Alien Jesus began to spread his gospel of truth, love, light, and advanced technologies. Amen.